Feeling lonely
has always been a constant presence in my life. When my sister left for a
different city to pursue her studies, I was left alone at home, with no one to
fight over the TV remote. Later, the same feeling would accompany me when I
returned to my hostel bed after college. This feeling of loneliness persisted
during my bachelor's days, even after coming home from work.
The weight of
this emotion was so heavy that it followed me everywhere, whether I was in the
office, on a tour with friends, or attending a family gathering. It took time
to understand that, like fear, anger, and love, loneliness is also an emotion.
However, it is a subtle one, yet possessing immense power to lead one towards
unhealthy habits such as alcoholism or addiction to pornography.
There is a
subtle difference between loneliness and a void, and we often confuse the two.
Sometimes, we transition quickly from feeling lonely to desperately trying to
fill that void with whatever comes to mind. We engage our minds in a frantic
and reckless manner, without considering whether the things we use to fill the void
are good or bad, or if they may lead to lifelong habits.
The best way to
avoid loneliness is to first acknowledge that it is merely an emotion that will
fade over time. Next, recognize that loneliness is not an external factor but
an internal emotion. Once we understand this simple truth, half the battle is
won. Then, we need to ask ourselves, "What's wrong with feeling lonely? Is
it so terrible?" However, we must be cautious not to develop habits solely
to counteract loneliness. The more we engage in activities driven by
loneliness, the more intense the feeling becomes, resembling an addiction. This
is where alcoholism and various addictions find their roots.
Once we
understand and accept loneliness as a natural part of life, we can embrace the
notion that feeling lonely is okay. We don't need to counter this thought.
Instead, let's harness the power of loneliness to fuel our productivity. By
repeating this mindset for a few days or during instances of loneliness, the
grip of loneliness weakens within us. Eventually, the feeling of loneliness
itself will find new ways to engage us, almost like magic.
P.S: Say this in your mind whenever you feel lonely: Yes, I am feeling so lonely. So what? Do not suggest me useless thoughts and toxic habits to evade loneliness.